Adventures in Child Psychology

(I'm justifying this post because it centers around mental energy, which, like natural resources, is important not to waste!)

This week, I am reading Rapt by Winifred Gallagher. So far, it is a fascinating read, although I wish she would go into more detail about the practical applications of the research and experiments she describes. In a nutshell, the premise of the book is that our reality is what we pay attention to, so if we pay attention to the positive things we will experience a more positive life. Which is great in theory (who doesn't want that?!) but how do you make it happen?

Enter stage left: my six year old.

Late Sunday morning she appeared droopy, and I speculated out loud whether she might be coming down with something. The weather was gorgeous: low humidity, few clouds, mid-seventies with a light breeze. She complained she was cold, and spent her outdoors time bundled in a jacket, languishing in the sun.

Surely she was sick, I said!

After a few hours gardening, I relaxed in the sun for a while, and she stayed right with me despite my encouragement to go inside, or at least rest in the shade. Later in the afternoon she fell asleep (in the shade, thank goodness!) in one of the deck chairs. Her temperature was 103. We moved her indoors and bundled her up on the couch.

There was now no doubt she was sick. Which was too bad: Monday was the last full day of school, and to celebrate the kids were staging a "beach day". The poor dear was distraught over the possibility she would miss school the next day. Any parent who's had a sick kid (um, that would be every parent) would have recognized the tremulous whine and lethargy that are the hallmarks of the truly ill child.

But what if it wasn't real?

About 5:30 it dawned on me. Maybe she created a reality of being sick because I mentioned it, and she believed it, and then she selectively focused her attention on how crappy she felt? That's what could happen, if Gallagher is to be believed.

So I started telling her she was perfectly fine. Dehydrated, yes. Overheated from so much time in the sun, definitely. Still tired from a late night at a friend's house the night before, no doubt. I engaged her in talking about what to pack for Beach Day. (The conversation was punctuated by the plaintive whine, "But what if I'm too sick tomorrow?") I told her she had to have a bath. ("But I'm so cold!") I gave her some medicine for the fever, started making her sip water every few minutes.

"You're fine," I told her over and over. "Tired, overheated, and dehydrated, but these are all things we can fix."

Part way through her bath, IT happened.

She started arguing with me. Somewhere in all the whimpering about being cold, she summoned the strength to disagree; and while I normally disapprove, this time I said, "See, you must be feeling better, if you can argue with me!"

"I'm not arguing!"

"See, you did it again!"

She started giggling. The end-of-the-world wailing had stopped. By 6:30 - in the space of an hour - she had completely turned around, and was back outside blowing bubbles. Her fever had dropped to 100.2. Her attitude had completely changed.. No more languishing on the couch with not even enough energy to lift her head to drink some water.

I was blown away. I'm still dazed by what happened. I had hoped it would work, but didn't really think it would work THAT well!

I need to start paying more attention to everything I say to both her, and her sister, from now on. Who knows what other unintended consequences a parent's words might have on a child's reality!

Best Garment Saving Tip EVER

Particularly for those with children! If it seems like they are growing out of their jeans way too quick, try this. Wash the jeans in cold water. When they come out of the wash, hold the waist band of the jeans in one hand, the hem in the other, and pull. Yes, literally. You are stretching the pants out. Then let them air dry.

It works wonders! Apparently cotton continues to shrink little by little after repeated wash/dry cycles. I thought my oldest had suffered another growth spurt, but this little trick added so much length to the jeans she ended up stepping on the cuffs! The only tricky part is if you stretch one leg at a time, making sure to stretch them by the same amount.

Another "I Don't Know What to Cook for Dinner" Website

I previously posted about RecipePuppy and Recipe Key as the antidote for the last-minute trips out for dinner because you don't know any recipes for the ingredients you have on hand.

But the bloggers over at LifeHacker have turned up a new one, that's even better! Why? It suggests other ingredients, based on the recipes being returned by your search results! I present: SuperCook!

It doesn't have a lot of the nice filter options of Recipe Key, but the "Do you have?" feature is priceless. If I have "chicken breast", I won't necessarily think of "worcestershire sauce" as another ingredient. But the two together is all I need for an easy blackened chicken recipe. Yum!

Better than that, it's additive. When I added "honey" and "mustard" to the search, the blackened chicken recipe still showed up, rather than being filtered out just because it didn't need those additional ingredients. Wonderful!

On the Mend

One of the hardest parts of cutting back has been mending clothes. To be blunt about it, I abhor menial sewing tasks. Replacing buttons? Hemming pants? Bleh. But I have steeled myself to the ennui of mending to serve the greater good.

The best example is my black wool coat. I have worn this coat for three winters now. Around December last year, I nearly broke down and bought a new one, because I had literally worn the edges through at the wrist. My favorite smart-looking and professional coat had officially reached "shabby" status. But I really, really, REALLY did not want to spend $100 or more on a new wool coat.

Enter: scraps of black satin left over from another sewing project. (Remember, it's not sewing I despise, just mending.) I cut two long rectangles, and used machine- and hand-sewing to attach the rectangles to the sleeves to serve as bindings! Shabby solved! In fact, the black-on-black satin-plus-wool texture combination was pretty stylish looking.

This simple repair helped the coat survive the rest of the winter. It since has lost a button, and the satin bindings are starting to look ratty too. Of course, the past two mornings have been cold enough I had to repair the button so I could wear it again. I might even have to new bindings on the sleeves.... maybe with matching binding on the collar to pull the whole look together!

Reduce, Reuse... Recycle?

Dinner tonight: balsamic salmon, rice, and wilted micro greens with pecans and dried cranberries.

Which is the gourmet way of saying "I couldn't bear to just throw away all the broccoli, cauliflower, and celery that I started indoors and then didn't have room to plant in the garden, so I cut off the leaves and sauteed them in sesame oil with baby spinach."

And it was good.

The Convenience Tax

Last night, our family took three small steps towards freeing ourselves from the convenience tax.

It was hard, but necessary.

Baby step 1: Buy a head of lettuce, rather than the pre-cut, pre-washed, ultra-convenient bagged lettuce available everywhere. I can make the time to wash and chop my own lettuce. Honestly. (Anyway, this is just an interim step until the lettuce in the garden gets big enough to eat.)

Baby step 2: Block cheese instead of pre-shredded. OK, we still aren't convinced of the value here, since we buy our shredded cheese at a discount bulk grocer; but for the regular store, it's definitely cheaper to go block.

Baby step 3 (and the hardest of them all): Buying ground coffee by the pound at the store, instead of the individual K-cups. See, I got a Keurig coffee maker for Christmas, and it is AWESOME! But a 20-pack of the K-cups (pre-filled with grounds) it uses to brew the coffee generally costs $10. Maybe you have a coupon so it doesn't cost as much; but they don't sell them at the regular grocer so you have to make a separate stop for them. I also received a fill-it-yourself contraption, that lets you basically create your own cup. It's a pain because instead of just tossing the used cup in the trash you have to clean it out for the next time. However, a pound of ground coffee on sale costs less than a box of cups with a coupon, AND lasts a lot longer.

Do I think thumbing my nose at the Convenience Tax will make a huge difference to our weekly grocery budget? Not really. But hopefully we get in the mindset where we look for other, less obvious examples where we pay at premium for convenience. Baby steps...

Never Buy Graph Paper Again

I'm constantly buying new pads of graph paper to replace the ones that disappear around my house.  I never need a whole pad of paper; usually I just need one sheet.  But as long as I have it around, I feel compelled to use it, especially given the expense.  However, I just found a website that will let you create your own PDF graph paper, that you can then print out one sheet at a time, as you need it!

 

http://incompetech.com/graphpaper/

 

(Yes, I am plotting my Square Foot Garden, how could you tell?)